How To Deal With A Long Distance Relationship?
Many people, when faced with the prospect of a long-distance relationship, will simply throw in the towel. They reason that it’s never going to work. But separation from your loved one doesn’t necessarily mean despair.
While long distance relationships are hard work, they can be very successful, especially if your plans are to eventually get together physically as well as emotionally. If you really love your partner, the extra effort is worth it.
8 Ways To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work
#1. Make the most of the time you have
When you’re living miles apart, time together becomes precious. Even phone and email time is restricted. This is especially true if you live in different time zones. So when you are together, focus on strengthening your bond. There’s nothing worse than stealing a weekend together, breaking the bank for a plane ticket and spending all your time fighting.
When you are together physically or even on the phone, be honest and open. Stay focused on how great your partner is and why you love each other. Don’t let petty grievances spoil your time. It’s very important to have a broader perspective because you have much narrower access to each other.
#2. Become a logistical genius
You can’t afford to miss opportunities to be together, so plan like a demon. Set aside weekends to be together and buy your flights ahead to save money.
If one of you is nearby on a business flight, make plans for a stopover. Discuss holidays long in advance, so you can get the details worked out and maximize your togetherness opportunities.
#3. Have long distance dates
Set aside some time to spend on the phone or video Skype even if you can’t see each other in person. Guard this time jealously and don’t miss a date. It doesn’t have to be a phone-sex-fest either.
Talk about mutual interests; catch up on each other’s lives. Make sure you know what’s going on with your partner’s work life, friends and family. This kind of sharing strengthens your connection even from afar.
#4. Surprise your partner
Aside from your planned phone dates and weekends together, let your partner know you’re thinking about them with surprise flowers or hand-written notes. It could be an unexpected photo or even a small gift.
If you travel for business, pick up something small for your partner just as you might if you lived together. Beware, however, of the surprise visit. If your partner doesn’t know you’re coming and has made other commitments, you might end up alone for your surprise love-fest.
#5. Share the travel
It’s inconvenient to take a flight every time you want to see each other, but be sure both of you are traveling equally. You can trade off visiting each other or even take a few trips where you travel to a third location and get away from it all together. Try our travel compatibility test.
#6. Build your self-confidence
Being away from someone you love can be painful, but this is a chance to learn that you can take care of yourself. You can be OK with spending time alone on Saturday nights or on Valentine’s Day. You can learn that you don’t need a partner to make you a happy person.
Having this kind of confidence in yourself will make you a stronger partner in the long run. You’ll appreciate being with your partner without being terrified that you’ll fall to pieces if the relationship does.
#7. Beware of crushes
When your partner is far away, it’s easy to be distracted by someone close by who’s been flirting with you. The interloper is available and accessible. You might find yourself gravitating toward this new interest and comparing them favorable to your long-distance love. But when your partner isn’t there to remind you why you adore them, it’s easy to think that this new person will offer you more.
Whatever you do, don’t cheat on your partner. It’ll endanger your relationship and cause bitter feelings even if you end up together. If you do decide to leave your partner in favor of your crush, see each other first, break up in person and handle it maturely.
#8. Have a clear plan for ultimately being together
Long distance is tough on a relationship. It’s not usually a good long-term plan. Couples may need to make sacrifices for a career or for family, but you two should agree on a specific date or event at which you’ll relocate. You need to agree also on where you’ll relocate to. Don’t just assume your partner will move in with you. Your partner may have the opposite idea, and you’ll have a bad time when you figure that out.
It’s not easy to make a long-distance relationship work, but if you’re diligent and take advantage of the great communication channels out there, you’ll have no problem keeping the spark in your relationship. When you find the love of your life, a few miles should never stand in your way.