Divorce Proof Your Relationship: 15 Ways to Do It
When a couple decides to get married, they don’t typically think “divorce-proof your relationship” right away. You take a life partner expecting to be with that one person till death does its part. No one thinks about separation at this point.
Breakups are painful, and the healing process can take what seems like an eternity. There are many reasons to end a marriage abruptly, but we hope you won’t become a statistic. Staying married to a person takes commitment, effort, and discipline. With this in mind, we want to help divorce-proof your relationship.
Couples Who Stay Together Forever, Do This
If you’re in a committed relationship, you’ll put in work to stay together. There’s no magic glue guaranteeing you’ll be married for a lifetime. Couples who celebrate 40 years or more of marital bliss can tell you best how to divorce-proof your marriage.
These couples are evidence marriages do last. Here’s how married people stay together after many years of matrimony.
How To Divorce Proof Your Relationship
1. Wait a Few Years Before Tying the Knot
If there was a magical number for couples, three is the number. Studies show waiting three years before getting married lowers the risk of separation or divorce. The longer you date, the more you will get to know your partner.
2. Burn Old Bridges
Make a clean break from your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. For some people, closure is necessary to move forward. For every chapter that ends, a new chapter begins. You write the book, so set it up for success. Write out the things and people who will haunt you and ghosts. In other words, burn the bridge so even if you wanted to go back, you couldn’t.
3. Too Blessed to Be Stressed
You don’t want to start your married life in debt. We all want the lavish wedding and the exquisite diamond ring, but not everyone can afford the elegance. If this is your case, opt out of financial debt by being realistic.
Buy affordable rings (cubic zirconia make excellent alternatives) and plan well in advance for the honeymoon, so you save money. Financial stress is not the way to start a marriage. In fact, it’s the best way to end a marriage.
4. Divorce-proof Your Relationship by Marrying the ‘Nice’ Guy
Do you ever wonder what a guy like that is doing with a girl like that? Well, he’s a nice guy, and for a change, he placed first. Instead of insisting on your list of unrealistic standards for a husband, look beyond the surface of a man. The perfect man puts his woman first, his mental stability, and takes care of his physical health.
5. Solves Problems Together
You’re a partnership now. When there’s a problem, you need to solve it together. When you communicate, it opens doors. You can find a solution that meets each other’s needs and expectations.
Once you solve the problem, you can move forward as a unit—no hidden resentments and regrets, which are later causes of divorce.
6. Remember the Friendship When you Divorce Proof Your Relationship
Friendship is a special bond people share. Before you became a spouse, you should have been friends. When all else fails, you can fall back on the friendship and companionship you both share.
Many long-term marriages survive because couples are best friends and lovers. Love may come and go, but friendships keep relationships alive.
7. Divorce proof Your Relationship by Participating
Having a partner is great until you are constantly expecting your better half to do all the work. Avoid falling into the trap of getting someone else to do the job. It would help if you contributed to work and finances, as long as you are able. You are partners, not dependents.
A partnership requires an equal contribution from both parties. When you work together as a team, it’s better for your emotional and mental health.
8. You are Still Important
When you marry, people start thinking you and your partner are a unit rather than two separate individuals. This is far from the truth. You are two individuals in a partnership. Marriage is a union of two unique people. Hence you are still important as an individual.
Although you are married, you should avoid falling into your partner’s shadow or vice versa. Be yourself as this is the person your partner was attracted to in the beginning.
9. Divorce proof Your Relationship by Communicating
Communication comes in many ways. Write a love letter, a cute message or just a short note to your partner. How you leave the message is not as important as the exchange of thoughts and dreams. Marriages stay strong and alive because they communicate.
Studies show that couples who stop talking and listening to each other have a higher risk of divorce than couples who air out their grievances.
10. Give Support
If you have a family, support your partner during tough times. Divorce-proof your relationship by standing up for your spouse when your family criticizes your husband or wife. Uphold the rules set for the children.
Giving support not only means you are on your partner’s side, but you are also showing it to everyone. Showing you support your spouse is an important habit you should practice.
11. Divorce proof Your Relationship by Getting Support
It is not only important to give support, but it is also crucial to accept the support you get, too. Being a couple means you can rely on each other physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Be thankful for the support you have, and accept help when you need it.
No one is perfect, but marriage is a partnership. If you aim for marriage for life, you have to accept or get support from your spouse.
12. Share Common Interests
Sharing a few common interests helps keep communication channels open—divorce-proof your relationship by finding something to share. Maybe join a cooking class, or learn a new language together.
Staying active as a family or couple strengthens relationships, and it helps you grow as a unit. Besides, it makes you feel less lonely compared to learning alone.
13. Let it Go
It would be best if you let go of anger, resentment, and unfinished business. Do not harp on things, as nagging never improve relationships. Let bygones be bygones. It’s important not to repeat the same mistakes.
If you are constantly reminding your partner about the past, your relationship won’t move forward. Letting things go is better for your mental health because emotional baggage can cause some serious problems.
14. Remember your Commitment
Some people forget marriage is a lifelong commitment. Once you sign the dotted line and say your vows, you should mean them.
It takes effort to keep a commitment, and you must remember the seriousness of the vows you made to your spouse. It takes two people to keep a marriage alive, so remind each other of the promises you made from time to time. They do this by renewing their vows during anniversaries.
15. Divorce proof Your Relationship by Listening
Divorce-proof your relationship by listening. Listen by using your eyes and ears. Sometimes the visual clues tell you things your partner is not saying. Everyone has something to say, but you also have to return the favor by listening.
Marriage is about communication, and listening is an important half. More importantly, listen to what is not being said. A strong marriage is one in which both sides are listening to each other.